The Turning Point

Hey, stop stop! I dropped my cap at the last turn.

Oh Crap Aahana, seriously! Let it go now. I’m not turning back.

It’s your gi… Never mind..Eh, please, I’m sorry , just stop here na please I’ll go get it.

Fine! You wait, I’ll get it.

I stopped my bike nearby and walked towards her proud little pink cap which I gifted her in college with the money I owe her and she still has it. All this time, she’s been holding on to a mess like me, all these 7 years, but yeh she’s still the same, careless little nagging creature.

Arjunnn...She screamed, as hard as she could. But it was too late, it was just a fraction of second I saw a gigantic truck just a mm away. Last I remember I fell down on the ground hard and felt pain I never had experienced before, but it lasted only a few seconds until darkness surrounded me.

I opened my eyes, I couldn't believe the dark & silence, it was like never before. All I could remember was being in an accident. I saw my surroundings, the darkness was as pure as it could get. I was sure that my eyes are open & was lying down on a moist soft ground, as I tried to get up I felt as light as a feather. So swift, I couldn't really understand how. I was still trying to relate the accident with the darkness. I stood up and started walking, it was dark but I didn't feel the fear, very unusual of me. I could never do anything, literally anything in such sharp dark ever, but here without fear of falling I kept walking and walking.

I was trying to hear something, my breath, sound of my own breath but didn't feel anything at all... No sound of footsteps, but I kept walking till how long I don’t know.Time was irrelevant. I stopped when I saw a small ball of light, size of a dust particle and that was all I could see. I looked at it for long as it slowly moved. I then realized I could magnify my vision, I could never do it before. In amazement I looked at it and then saw it expanding and slowly it turned into size of a bean and then larger. As I was deeply engrossed into that magnificent phenomenon I heard a soft thought in my mind & I suddenly realized that someone is trying to talk to me.. I couldn't hear the words but only understand the meaning and intention of the messenger. It was asking me to move ahead & do what I feel right now… all I felt was to touch the light & I immediately reciprocated my thoughts and touched it with my feather light hands.

When I did, I realized that it was the most peaceful thing I ever felt, it was as pure as a Mother’s first kiss and as spiritual as Nirvana. I was drowning into utter amazement & felt my eyes widening & going deep into that light. As soon as I overcame the sensations of the touch I was slowly pulled across the light and as contrary to the first experience this time it was all white, as white as it could get. I wasn't sure if I was floating or standing upon my feet & then it began.

The memories, they began to flow slowly into my mind but they were not mere the images of past but the feelings of all the people associated with it, It felt like an ocean of memories on my head just waiting for the showcase. It started with my accident, how it happened. At the same time I could feel my pain , my last thoughts , and thoughts of Aahana…how shocked she was and how badly she blamed herself for the accident…memories were flowing backwards & when she dropped her cap, she was peeping into the rear view to look at my face while I was driving, I could hear my thoughts at the same time, while I was worried that I couldn't clear the latest interview also & about the argument I just had with my parents. I was thinking about how they refused me to take the bike & be focused and how rude I was to them. At the same time, she was thinking that how I have changed over the time, from a happy cheerful guy to an irritated one, but how much she loves me to get past me. While these memories were running , I felt the burden shrink & I realized that how much I loved her and how much she loved me. The urge to see her at that moment was inexplicable and then the flashes changed. 

It was my home and I was having an argument with my parents, I couldn't hear a word but only the thoughts running in my & my ma & papa’s mind. I was outraged, I was thinking that no one understands me & my mother was thinking that they might be too harsh on me and will allow him to take the bike as soon as they finish talking. I could remember the exact words my dad said to me at that moment that how I wasted my life & how I will be a disgrace if I don’t start working soon enough but I was stunned when I could hear his thoughts at that time he said those things; he was thinking that I might be too stressed for the journey & was afraid to lose me… his instincts were telling him to stop me today, come what may & I realized why!

After that I felt my heart started to break with emotions but the flashes continued, after showing me each & every moment of how I spent my life my last day in college, my first day in college, when I met my best friend Roy & the fun we had, our endless laughs, when I first saw Ahana, when I first felt something for her, when she smiled at me for the first time, when I kissed her & made love, it was all coming back and then my school, how my father took us to a holiday when I passed my 12^th,how much fun we had, every time I had food, the taste of food my mother cooked, It was all good as real & I could feel it more than I could. each time I was happy each time I was sad, the flashes were going backwards and I could see my childhood, my preschool and when I was just a few months old. Each time my family held me with care & I could feel their love all over again. I could never have realized that how much they had loved me & how could I forget it. Then the moment came when my mother held me in her arms for the first time & I could feel the amount of pain she went through but when I felt her love for me the burden of the thoughts was over, I understood everything that ever happened to me. I met God at that moment & this should be the moment my Soul should pass & never come back but may be a human was still alive deep inside my memories & I was pulled back through the same light & through the same darkness & once again I opened my eyes.